Thursday, June 26, 2014

Flesh Wounds

"There is an ocean between us. WHY??????"

The ocean you created? I just wanted to vent to you but you took it the wrong way and got offended. Went off the deep end and told me I wasn't good enough for you. And then when I called you out on your head game of manipulating me to move down there for you--even though I made my mind to be there AFTER Christmas cuz of snow and ice and wanting to be with my family, you said that you're going to spend the holidays alone. Purely selfish act. Give up my family and life for you.

And when you told me I wasn't good enough for you, and I tell you why that bothered and irritated me, you go on this evangelical tirade that I should "succeed and fly like an eagle cuz that would mean I had a good and positive influence on you."

What. The. Fuck. Was. That. About...

Was it the ocean that you've just created?

I've fallen deep and hard for you and then when you tell me you're online dating to meet other men, I'm even more disgusted and hurt. You weren't really focusing on school because you were wanting to replace me. I really don't know what the hell is going on in your mind now. Called me blind-sided and confused.

Then when I saw your email today saying, "I miss you horribly." There's no justification in what you've said previously. What is going on with you? I understand your loneliness but you've blew me completely out in left field.

Moving on is hard. And difficult. And you know how to illicit a response from me so its hard for me to ignore you. I'll get better. I won't check my phone or email so much. Fresh wounds and I'm tired of getting them reopened by you.

I promise I won't get so blinded and blind-sided by your love any more. Rough seas ahead...

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