Friday, February 14, 2014


As we're waiting for the cable guy to upgrade her Internet throughout the house, I found some random pics that made me laugh so early in the morning. Then I told her and she just said, "Aren't you just so easily amused?"

Yeah. I am.

And for Valentine's Day, we're installing a door knob with a lock to her room so the kids won't mess with her stuff. They leave mine alone, but not hers. Wonder why...

And Valentine's Day should be every day!

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

I Just Wanted You To Know

We slept off and on, a restless night. Mainly cuz of her cervical stenosis which kept her restless and in pain with me equally anxious cuz I couldn't do anything for her. In a brief moment of bliss she said, "I think I'm needy since I wasn't shown this much affection or love in six years. I think men and women get needy or clingy of sex or companionship. I mean before I met you, I was always wet and it hurt and literally drove me crazy! I can imagine what it does for you men. But now, I'm satisfied and I have a parter who treats me like a person instead of cattle to be used and abused".

"Thank you so much for coming out here but I don't know why anyone would want to be with me and my problems. I know I'm a lot stronger in my mind for all that you've done for me and I love you so much for that. But you gave up your job and life to be with me. I've always thought I was a loser but that's in the past before I met you. Everything is different now. I was numb before and now I'm agitated. At least I'm feeling SOMETHING and something is better than nothing".

"I just wanted you to know that I love your ass".

And then I hugged her some more and smelled her hair while she drifted off to sawing logs in a petrified forest. It's supposed to continue snowing, sleeting and icing around the Atlana area and outskirts. BOO.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Kiss Me Before You Go

Is it a form of neediness that we always have to be touching each other wherever we go, or say like even on bed? I've never encountered this before so this is all new to me. During the night we might end up holding the other is some form like holding hands or leg over leg or even skin touching skin, especially that. And if skin isn't touching skin, we wander to where the other is and touch their skin.

I don't know what to call it. She'll say, "kiss me before you go except when I'm sleeping". I do it anyway and smell her hair.

Saturday, February 1, 2014

My Pretty Baby

Yeah. I think I love her. I tell her so every so often as she says the same when we're together. Never thought I'd be in complete madness. That's what it is. Literally. I have to detach from her sometimes so I can breathe in my own space.

But...whenever she's in bed and I'm not there, she says...

"Your skin isn't touching mine. And I can't sleep."
"I can't be with you all the time even though I want to."
"Its not the same when I sleep alone and I hate waking up without you."