Thursday, May 29, 2014

Where Do We Go From Here

I know where I'm going...I'm not gonna end up worrying about her and how she affects me in a negative way by breaking my heart over and . over again.

I was actually very productive today: made Dad's appointments and follow-ups, picked up his meds, applied for three online positions at Baptist hospital, got chlorine jugs for the damn pool--its becoming more of a headache to maintain than to be fun, got a water report on it, watched the baby for an hour or two, did some yard work which I HATE cuz sweating in this Florida heat blows. And a bunch of other stuff. Was busy all day from the time I ate breakfast to around seven thirty tonight.

Yeah, I'm not gonna dwell on Switch, did text her grown daughter that I was worried about her. Her daughter and I never got along well when I lived in Georgia; we chatted but nothing with substance. Like "Hi Shannon, bye Shannon". Stuff like that. Shannon did cockblock me once. I like the 24 year old blond airhead, but that's it. She disrespects hs er mom, Sam, which is something I can't stand so I just avoid that little shit so I won't have the urge to trip her down the stairs or something heinous.

Mark said I should brainstorm on what I like to do and use that criteria on finding the job that I want: never thought of that. I like to do a lot of things, mostly physical. I know I like helping people in crisis, but then I have the personality of a stone face, a blockhead. And I can laugh at myself and at you without making it so obvious.

I also like working on engines, painting, building shelves, mowing the yard, cooking, talking to people and listening to what they have to say and listening to their stories. Stuff. Right now, I'm trying not to think about Switch uch cuz I know I'll flounder and lose my ground. I mean, she's still my a distance cuz that's all I can stand of her at the moment. She's got way too many issues and I don't want her to drag me down and make me feel guilty of the way I'm feeling.

Yeah...keep myself busy. That's the ticket. I still miss her though, holding and touching her skin, listening to her talk in that Georgia peach Southern accent of hers. WOO!! Shut that door!!

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